Who Belongs? (AYQ #10)

Today’s edition of “Answering Your Questions” will only deal with one question.
“I started seeing prostitutes because I wanted to to have sex with women. But too often when I’ve been looking for a woman to fuck I end up seeing adds for dudes pretending to be women. Do you think these “tranny” people should be a part of our group? Shouldn’t they just have their own places? I don’t want to see them on the websites I go to. This is supposed to be about men having sex with women.” — Anonymous

This is not the first time I have heard such a sentiment. There are many people within the CTS community that do not feel that Transgender or Transexual individuals belong here. The same with others from the LGBTQ spectrum (except for bisexual female providers). There are some who do feel that LGBTQ people should be on separate websites than those used by the rest of the community.

While I certainly think that the LGBTQ CTS Community could have some good benefits from websites that cater specifically to them (I have to assume that there are some such sites that I am unaware of). But I do not agree at all that they should be excluded from the general CTS Community at all. In fact, I am a firm believer at all parts of the CTS Community must stand together—united—if we ever want to have any real hope at decriminalization and some semblance of social acceptance.

I will admit, that like the our anonymous inquirer, I have had my share of frustrations when searching through listings and advertisements on some websites. I will come across an attractive lady, only to find out that she is TG/TS. Such a provider does not meet my personal needs or desires. I have to say that I have appreciated sites that have search filters that allow me to exclude trans providers from my personal searches, or that clearly mark which listings belong to trans providers.

But these providers should not be excluded from the websites. For one thing, there is a significant portion of male clients in the CTS Community who enjoy the company of both female and trans providers. Others are curious about it, so having inclusion makes things easier for the curious clients.

But there is a much more fundamental reason for inclusion: We are all in this together. There is no difference in what straight female providers do and what trans or other LGBTQ providers do. Anatomical differences do not change the actual nature of Consensual Transactional Sex.

In recent months I have personally noticed an increase in the positive interactions between the “straight” CTS people and the LGBTQ CTS people, especially on social media sites. Perhaps the disruption caused by FOSTA had a positive impact in making some within the community realize that we are all one group. Our desires and attractions may vary greatly, but our quests for sex unite us.

Throughout our community there is a definite need for “niche” websites. Whether it be places to explore BDSM, discover the pleasures of FBSM, dive into the world of role-playing, or experience pleasure from someone of the same gender — having specialized sites can make this better. But we must all also have places where we can come together as one Community. I hope that The ValleyScott Blog can be one such place. And I am grateful that social media sites like Switter afford us such an opportunity. We are all one Community, even if some are uncomfortable with that reality.