A Public Apology
Hello readers. I made a huge mistake [on July 9th] that may have cost me the friendship of an amazing person. This tremendous error is a burden I now have to bear, and I offer her a public apology:
Dear Miss Sabrina Luv,
I want to offer to you my most sincere apologies. There is no other way to say it, than to say I screwed up tremendously last night. You have put much trust and faith in me and I returned that by breaking one of your basic—an easiest to follow—rules. I am an Idiot and a Fool.
I do wish to tell you what happened, not as an excuse. There is no excuse for my behavior. But I do hope that if you know, you will understand, and perhaps in time, forgive me.
My dearest Sabrina, I had been waiting with great excitement all day to see you. You know how excited I was. It had been 199 days since last we saw each other. A long time. Honestly, the anticipation was killing me. I had hoped you would be in town earlier, but you were hung up in traffic.
I was driving around, just trying to kill some time, when I received your text that you had not yet checked in to your hotel. A minute later as I was driving, you pulled out of a parking lot in front of me. It was a pure coincidence that I ended up behind you. A random event. At that point I was going to drive over to different place so I could return your text. But when I saw it was you I literally lost my mind. I forgot all protocol and etiquette. I just figured I could talk to you in person instead of texting you. So one block later I pulled into the hotel parking lot behind you and parked and came over.
I was not thinking. I offer no excuse. I know that I should not have come into the parking lot. I should not have approached your car. I should have kept driving. I should have been elsewhere.
It has been so long since I have seen you, that all I could think of was seeing you. I forgot that despite our friendship, despite the closeness we share, the Rules still exist. You have called me your best friend in the past, but I am also a client. And clients must follow the rules.
I am so sorry. Truly I am heart-broken that I have made such a huge error. I hold out some glimmer of hope that I have not fully destroyed our friendship. I hope that you can forgive me and give me another chance. I admit here, before everyone, that I am a fool. 199 days I waited for you. A short time more should have been easy. But I was stupid. Despite all my knowledge and words, I lacked wisdom last night.
Sabrina, please accept my apology. You have every right to be angry with me. I will understand if you do not reply to this. I will understand if you never talk to me again. I betrayed your trust, and there is no excuse for that. I just hope you might find forgiveness in your heart for a silly fool like me.
Take care of yourself, my dear Sabrina. You will always be the best. You will always be my favorite. You are the one who has healed me. You have often been my muse and inspiration. You gave me the confidence to even do this blog. I will forever be grateful for all you have done for me. Thank you for being the amazing person you are.
If this is good-bye, then know that I say so with great pain and love. Be well, my friend.
—Scott, an idiot
It’s Not Scott The Idiot.
Do Not Ever Bring Yourself Down, Or Talk Down About Yourself.
Do Understand That, We Are Human. We Make Mistakes All The Time. There Are Times, We Learn From Them. But Try Not To Repeat Them.
There Are Times, We End Up Repeating them. & For Some, Just Don’t Grasp It.
It’s Part Of This Damn Life.
But There Is One Thing That You Must Know.
Just Cause You Like To Give Me Credit For Giving You Confidence & Make You Feel Better About Yourself.
Really, Its Been All You On Your Own. All I Did Was Give You A Boost, The Rest You Learned To Maintain It. Look Where It Lead You.
So Do Not At All, Try To Give Me Credit For It. Thank All Those Other People Who Give You The Ability To Blog. All The Nice Comments,
They Have Shared. Every Single One Of Them, Are More To Be Thankful For.
They All Put In Also. Cause Of Your Skills, Your Blogging You Honest Word. That entertain Many & Spread Envy To Many More
& For You To Talk Down On Yourself. Isn’t Fair To Yourself.
You Do Not Need To Criticize Yourself Over A Mistake. Or Need To Talking Down Upon Yourself.
I Do Understand That You Was Very Excited To See Me. Still, That Is No Excuse. I Was Hurt, Upset & Angry.
Just As I Stated,& This Shall Pass.
You Must Always Look At A Mistake In A Positive Way. But Also Learn From That Mistake & Make That Bring Light Upon Everything
Don’t Ever Let Me Read Another One Of Your Blogs Ever Putting Yourself Down.
That I Will Not Allow You To Do. A Mistakes Is Something That Many Gentle-Men Make.
But A True Gentle-Man Is Who Lives Up Their Mistake. And Points Them Out. they Are
a True One. You Did Not Lose Your Gentle-Man Style.
So I Do Not Ever Want To Read You Ever Putting Yourself Down Again.
Thank You For The Kind Words. As I Mention To You Already. You Dis Not Lose Me As Your Friend.
If I let Mistakes Like That Cross Our Friendship & End It Cause Of What Happen.
That There Would Make Me A Good Liar To All, I Talked About Forgiveness About.Then Turn Around & Show Everyone, Someone Different To All , Who I Have Define Myself To Be..
This Would Has Its Uls & Downs .
But, It”s Us Positive One”s Who Continue To Make This World Go Round.
Don’t Overly Worry Yourself My Luv
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Thank you for these kind words. I know there is a wall between us right now, a barrier that I created through my own foolish actions, but I do hope that one day it will come down.
I want everyone to see your reply, to see how special you are by how you responded. You had every right to come on here and blast me. I deserve it. But instead you came here and were kind. “Luv” is the name you use, but LOVE is the gift you have.
I want to give you the space and time to be angry with me. And–I hope–to forgive me. That is why I have waited to reply here. I will continue to give you the space and time you need. You are truly important to me. You are truly the best. And I never want to do anything that would hurt you again.
-With love and respect, Your friend, Scott.